Those of you who have been reading my blog for some time may think that I personally know trans people who have had gender correction surgery, to start really living in the body they should have had from birth. Sorry to disappoint you but this is just not true. In fact I haven’t personally known anyone; not that I have been aware of. Although I will admit I genuinely don’t give it any thought when I am in someone’s company.
That is until last Saturday. We went to dinner at the home of a dear friend of ours who was recovering from her operation. I have always admired her graceful uncomplaining journey of being trans. I don’t think I have ever met anyone who deserves more to have got what they set out for. Like many of us who may be determined to achieve a goal, there may be sacrifices, losses, and struggles along the way which challenge our faith and determination. But I have never seen her waiver; her strength and humility have been impressive.
I didn’t wish to pry and trusted she would only share as much as she wanted. I needn’t have been so reserved as I forgot what a boisterous bunch we can be. In the end she had very little choice but to be the butt of many a joke before the evening was out. My favourite moment was a Champaign toast; ‘To x’s fanny, and all who may sail in her.’
The thing that really struck me was an obvious glow of satisfaction she had about her; like the cat that had finally got the cream. Happiness, yes, but it was more contentment. Early this week we joked via texts that she was having hot flushes. I asked if the menopause was a buy one get one free offer with the op. She said she must have forgotten to tick the ‘opt out box’ for that on the consent form. Joking aside there was something about her, like a unique aura, but I cannot quite put my finger on what it was.
You know me by now; I am a believer, a fighter – but I wouldn’t go so far as activist, for trans issues. But seeing someone I like to think I have got to know in some depth over the years, almost transform, and I don’t mean by anything that was done on the operating table, has just convinced me more passionately about helping others to understand trans issues.